TIL: Why we like fear play

Exploring why people like fear play and how to navigate it.

Lately I’ve been captivated by forced drowning scenes and the balance of fear and beauty in the moment. 

It appeals to me as someone who has both sensory and trauma triggers associated with showers; playing with water and fear instantly pulled me in and I’ve been hungry to explore the fear I associate with showers. I’d say, for me, it’s equal parts a desire to: create a new experience and memory for my body to hold onto, the desire for adrenaline and the courage to face that fear head on with someone else by my side.

There’s something attractive about being scared. As human beings we love to play with concepts bigger than us; and fear is no exception. We ride roller coasters and scream, or jump out from behind corners to startle a sibling. We create haunted houses for both young and old, and we design movies to horrify any who watch. Fear play may sound ominous to those outside the BDSM community, but in actuality it’s a natural part of the human experience.

While fear play seems fairly straight forward in concept, I think it’s worth saying that “fear play” is more an umbrella of different experiences than just to be scared. 

For instance, when you watch a horror movie, do you only experience fear? Take a moment to think of the last horror movie you watched. You might have experienced fear but also: shock, disgust, panic, or suspicion? Playing with fear can also mean playing with feelings we associate with fear.

So, why do we as human beings feel so drawn to experiencing fear?